Colour me, With Love...

|| Sunday, December 05, 2010 ||

I am gonna start yabbering so if u arent interested please cover your eyes and ears.

Those who wants to feel my wrath and anger, please feel free to read on.

I have been with one man for the past 7 years. I have many friends back then and after his entry into my life, i realized i paid more attention to him than to the rest of my friends. Well, cos he was my priority and he was my boyfriend. I used to whip out my cell phone and start texting my friends if they text me. Then he told me that he didnt like it that i paid more attention to my phone.

And so i started this new habit of NOT WHIPPING out my cell when im with him. It so happened that i do the same when i out with my friend cos im sooo blady used to it.

So this became an issue cos I was ignoring him and all.. cos the habit was already in me, not whipping my cell out.

The argument started and its always the same old rubbish! The same old fight, the same old accusation!

*IM SELFISH*

I think that face has been established quite looooooong back and YES i do get it. I dont get it sometimes. Why is that my mistakes are being spotted and i get shot at? When its their own fault i should just shut my mouth?

The thing is that i love him way too much. I get agitated that sometimes he gives priority to his soccer games, matches. I complained a little but after that i got used to it.

Maybe i dont see it like how he does? Why doesnt he see it in my point of view?

I also do have a say in the relationship. I feel like im being thrown back to what i was years back, a physcho. Ya a crazy woman who madly in love and had a difficult time accepting rejection!

I hate REJECTION, its like eating bean sprout raw *bleah*

OK that is one issue.

The next issue is that: My best friend and i have not been seeing each other quite often. I really want to meet up with her and catch up. Its like for a week, loads may have happened so we would want to sit down and laugh at some of it.

SO Saturday was a perfect day to hang out while my boyfriend was out playing his soccer! I hate to stay home on a Saturday. Its damn boring..

So i told him that i was headed to meet her and then head to her grandma's house!

THAT, MY DEAR READERS WAS THE INITIAL PLAN

And guess who has to spoil the fugging plan?

Her ex!

Yes her ex!

I understand that he wants to hang out but why choose the day i was hanging out with her??? WHY??
So i thought he was hang out a bit and then the 3 girls, She, me and her cousin was to head back to holland. Then, it came!!

She ad to follow him to freaking jurong for a housewarming! A housewarming u said?

From town to jurong. Thats like going to another state!

So she followed him and i had to follow her cousin to punggol to get her eyebrows done. So she said we will meet back at the mrt and head to grandma's.

Me and her cousin were at punggol, but she didnt do her brows cos the shop was closing. We were stuck there.

THerefore, we girls shopped a bit and thought we could call my best friend and her annoying ex bf to ask whether they were done.

*Time check: 7.50pm*

Her reply was, they were still in the train!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TO make tings worst, her grandma called her cousin to ask where she was. How wonderful. That poor child started panicking. I panicked as well..

She was just 14years old and i was baby sitting her.

IT was supposed to be a day out with me, her and her cousin. Not some extra faces!

HE had to spoil the entire thing

AND i was to be her first priority!

We didnt even have a catch up session, NOPE not one bit.

Then to make things much worst, my bf, thought i forgot him. In the midst of things that were happening and were pissing me off, i didnt want to tell him that i was ditched by my best friend!

I was so damn upset, just couldnt bear it anymore. So she reached her grandma place around 9.15 pm, just in time to see me break down in tears out of frustration and tension.

I couldnt even smile.

So that was one thing right..

then my bf decided to ignore my calls..

So then the argument started and all..

HE switched off his phone and i was trying to call him. 100 times!! Then i came to a conclusion he switched off his phone.

My life is so depressing!

Thank god, i didnt jump off from my 2nd floor veranda. Even then i would have landed in the pile of construction rubble and would have lost an eye or something.

Maybe than, my boyfriend would have a reason to ditch me and find someone better cos im so god damn useless!!

Even right now, i feel so fugging useless that im worthless!

When my parents sell me also, i think no one would want to purchase me cos im worthless?!

So much for my happy ending

Labels: Happy Ending?